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Interviews
For Interviews by Kelly Mortimer-Select This Link
Elizabeth Ludwig’s Blogspot - What Agents Want
Monday April 16, 2007 – Meet Kelly Mortimer, of the Mortimer Literary Agency. Kelly, thank you for being here.
Let’s start by telling people how many proposals you receive in week:
Kelly: Haven’t you heard? I’m not accepting queries at this time. Strange, it seems you’re not the only one who hasn’t heard. I got so snowed under with queries, a St. Bernard couldn’t have found me—and I could’ve used the Brandy! I became an agent because I felt there were great authors out there, and not enough agents to represent them. I was correct. Unfortunately, I can't represent them all. I can do the work of three people, but only three. How’s that for taking a paragraph and not answering your question? I have specific guidelines on my Web site. There are only a select few ways I’ll accept a query right now. With those, plus the rogues who disregard the rules, I get about ten a week. Not too bad, but it’s still 40 a month, which adds up if you’re not supposed to be accepting queries. And being the soft-hearted gal that I am (don't believe those other things you hear...), I try to give everyone a chance, so most get a request.
EL: Can you tell me what kind of things you look for in a proposal?
Kelly: I can tell you, but then I’d haveta kill you.... Sorry, couldn't help it. My fingers have a will of their own. Seriously, in a query letter, I look for the genre/sub-genre, the word count, the author’s credits, and contest placements. Your next thought is, “That can't be right. What about plot, conflict, and characters?” I work differently than some agents; I have my reasons. Truth is, no matter how great a query reads, it doesn't usually translate into a great manuscript. I’m not even looking to evaluate a manuscript, but an author. Does the writer work in a genre I represent? Do I already have enough authors in that category? Has the writer ever sold a short story? Article? Anything to show me someone thinks their work is publishable. The word count tells me where I can sell the manuscript, and the contest info can hurt or help.
I know how hard it is to final in a contest, but things are changing. Being a final round judge in several contests, I know some of the material I’ve read isn’t publishable. There are so many contests now, the competition isn’t as stiff as it once was. The ultimate goal in entering a contest is to snag an editor or agent. If the manuscript has finaled in 10 contests, but nobody’s bought it or offered to represent the author, what does that tell me? The first three chapters are hot, and the rest has problems. I know the business is subjective, but at some point if a manuscript is that good, someone will want it. A few wins in the more major contests like the Golden Heart and the Genesis, or non-RWA National contests is better than finaling in a dozen smaller ones.
If I ask for a proposal, it’ll be the prologue (if applicable) and the first chapter, plus a short synopsis. If I don't like the work enough to represent the author, I know it right away. Why do I only ask for one chapter instead of three? The plot never falls apart by chapter three, and if I want the full, by the time I receive it I forget what I’ve previously read and have to start all over again. I figured I might as well re-read one chapter instead of three. If I ask for the full, I’ll want a complete marketing plan. As Jerry Maguire said, “Help me, to help you!” In this competitive market where more doors are closed to first-time authors than ever before, the writer needs to show the editor what they’re willing to do to help sell the book.
EL: On the average, how many new clients do you take on in a year?
Kelly: I evaluate very carefully, as I’m more of a partner than an agent. Each clients’ manuscripts get complete line edits, and that takes time. I’ve never read a manuscript that was completely error-free. I catch things, some small, some big, but every edge you can get, you need to take. The editors I submit to know I’ve gone over the manuscript, and it’ll be clean because I have more at stake than an agent who’s sent a client to a paid editor. Most agents don't have the time or inclination to edit. I think of this business as a war. Each client is different, and each needs their own battle plan. But one thing always holds true. A person fighting for their own country or beliefs is worth three mercenaries. I know, TMI! I’d do a terrible job on a lie-detector test. Can you imagine me giving a yes or no answer?! Actually, I have taken one. Off the track again.... There’s no reasonable answer. I might find one client in four months, or four in one month. But I have to stagger them, as I want each to get my full attention. I’ll know when I have more than I can properly care for, and then I’ll stop until other clients don't need as much of my time.
EL: What are the biggest reasons for rejecting a manuscript?
Kelly: I’m having a bad day. Okay, I have a lot of bad days, but that isn't the real reason. This one’s simple: The writing isn't good enough. Most manuscripts either need too much editing, or the manuscript (plot, characters) aren’t original enough. I’ve taken on a few authors who have great potential, but need some guidance in the editing area, but most writers submit way before they’re ready.
EL: What is the one thing you wish more authors did?
Kelly: Come on, I gotta pick one? Sheesh. Okay. I wish more authors would realize that agents are people just like writers. We have families, lives, and insecurities (well, some of us do...). We don't wanna hurt anyone’s feelings, and we’d love to say yes to everyone. We can't, and it’s nothing personal. What do I wish they’d do? Give a simple thank you, take any comments meant to help them with grace, and still like me as much as I like them, even if I have to pass. I know, dare to dream!
EL: Awesome feedback, Kelly. Thank you so much for taking the time to be interviewed.
Novel Journey Literary Agent Interview ~ Kelly Mortimer
by Gina Holmes
Welcome Kelly. Tell us a little about yourself, your agency and what type of writing you’d like to represent.
Hasn’t anyone ever told you? You can’t ask an Italian to tell you “a little bit” about anything! Okay, so I’ll give it a shot. Most importantly, I’m a Jesus lovin’ woman. What I do has to be legal, but moral as well. I’m bipolar, but only every other day. I love to make others laugh. No, not by showing up at a conference without my make-up on. I like to put others at ease, and getting them to laugh is a good start. And I’m not above laughing at myself, either. I’m loyal, kind, and generous. Now, if I just had time to shower, I could be a Girl Scout.
I’m proud to say the agency will be RWA approved in
January, 2007. I started Mortimer Literary so I could get some worthy unpublished writers published, both in the ABA and the CBA. I want every client to feel as if they’re my only client. My first order of business was to write down everything I hated about agents and agencies, and vow to do the exact opposite. Most agents (and it isn’t their fault) only have time to take on writers with “publisher ready” manuscripts, or writers who are already published. Since I don't need to be an agent to make a living, I can take more time to assist a writer who’s close to publication, but needs some help.
I have a gift for line editing, and I use it. I wield a red pen like James Bond wields a Martini. I want an editor to see my envelope and know what’s inside is clean. My name and the names of my writers are very important to me. We’re partners for better or worse, when published and not published, for as long as we both agree. And, no, they don’t haveta kiss me after the signing ceremony—not that there’s anything wrong with that….
What I represent is listed on my site, but it changes. Once I learn a new market, I add it to the list. Once I get a lot of submissions in a certain genre, I add it to the “not looking for” list. I like Contemporary and Historical, Paranormal, Suspense, Legal Suspense, Military and Spy Thrillers, Inspirational, and just about everything else except Erotica, Chick Lit, and Westerns.
Your signature line is, “diabolically diligent.” What does that mean in practical terms?
It means that I don’t fool around. Well, that’s not exactly what it means. I don't waste a second of my day. I can’t even stand still and wait for the microwave to finish heating something up. I’ll answer an e-mail, read a few pages of a manuscript, or file something. When my authors’ manuscripts arrive, three copies go out the next business day to pre-selected editors who are waiting for them. No, you don’t haveta re-read that line. I said THE NEXT DAY. There are exceptions, but very few. I strive to do my absolute best, no matter what I’m working on. If I had two broken legs and one broken arm, I’d use my good arm to drag the manuscripts to the FedEx shop. That’s what diligence means to me. I do what I say I’ll do. If by some strange occurrence I can’t, I don't hedge. I’ll call the author and tell them what happened, and I appreciate the same. Just give me the truth, straight up—unless the truth is you missed your deadline. In that case, HIDE!
Are you also a writer?
Yes and no. How’s that for a direct answer? Before I became an agent, I wrote 3 1/3 manuscripts, but didn’t actively seek to sell them. I entered my first two in some contests, both Medievals, and each finaled several times. I also wrote a RS/Mystery, and started a sequel. This last March, my dad died. He was my muse. He’d read more historical romances than Carter’s has pills. I interviewed him for hours on his tour of duty as a Marine in Korea, and I found out the article sold the day I found out my dad went to heaven. I haven’t written anything since, other than editing. Before that, I had 2 articles published in e-zines and sold 7 greeting card captions (I know, but I was told they count). I still maintain my writers Web site at: http://www.kellymortimer.com/, and know one day I’ll go back to writing, but not on my clients’ time.
Share with us how a prospective client would submit to you for consideration.
Sadly, in order to keep my level of attention per client high, I have to keep a short list. I do have details on the agency site: http://www.mortimerliterary.com/. Pretty standard. One-page e-mail queries only. Then three chapters and a short synopsis if requested, also via e-mail attachment. If I want a full manuscript, I need a hard copy. The agency does have one unique feature. If I ask for a full, the writer can e-mail the manuscript to my Staples Office Supply Store, and pay them over the phone with a gift card (they’ll have to purchase the gift card at their Staples). No credit card transactions are permitted over the phone. If the writer was going to pay for the copies anyway, it saves them shipping costs. And how do I get the manuscript? Don't faint. I actually take the 35 minute drive (one way) to pick the manuscript up. I’m only taking referrals from existing clients right now, but check the site for updates. As each client needs me less (sniffle, sniffle), I can add more.
Every agent has areas they are particularly strong in. What aspect of agenting do you excel at?
How many pages do I have? Sorry. First, sales. I sell over the phone with all the enthusiasm I can muster (which is quite a bit!). I don't send queries and partials. I have a database of over 250 editors, and what they want. When I sign someone, I ask them if they have a particular house(s) they’d like to write for, and if not, I’ll choose. Then I make calls until I find three editors who want the full manuscript. Saves everyone time, and I make a personal connection with the editor. I also have degrees in contract law and finance, and a real estate license. So, after I present an offer you agree to, and I make sure the contract covers your, ah, behind, as best I can, I can invest your advance on a great piece of land (I’m currently selling one-acre lots in Yosemite National Park).
Also, I excel at organization and efficiency. I’m maniacal. I keep spreadsheets of everything and each client gets a report once a month so they know exactly where their manuscripts are, and if I’ve called to check on the status, etc. One more and then I’ll stop. No, really! I like to make the business personal. For every editor rejection we receive, I send a handwritten thank you note on a nice card from both me and my author. And for an editor who buys a manuscript from the agency for the first time, I send a designer soap, which I make myself. A little appreciation and consideration go a long way to forging solid relationships.
What does your dream client look like?
Colin Farrell, if you meant that literally. If you’re not talking about looks, I’d like to represent writers who’ll work as hard as I will (good luck), who won’t give their editors any trouble (I don't wanna haveta slap my clients around), and who’ll trust me and let me do my job, which is to make the writer look good, and get them published. And most importantly, I’d like to represent authors who’d like nothing more than to write and promote, knowing I’m handling everything else for them.
What are some questions an author should ask of a prospective agent?
Has the agent ever sold a book to a reputable publisher? Self-explanatory. Ask to see a list of clients you can get in touch with BEFORE you sign a contract with the agent. Any agent who won’t tell you who they represent usually has a reason. If you really wanna know about an agent, see what their clients have to say about them. My clients gave voluntary quotes for the Home Page of my Web site, http://www.mortimerliterary.com/.
Does the agent charge up-front fees? Mortimer
Literary doesn’t charge a penny—just lots of dollars. Not really. I keep tabs on the shipping charges, but don't charge writers monthly. When I sell one of the writer’s books, the shipping and overseas phone call costs (if any) come out of the advance, and I send all receipts to the writer. If their books never sell (like that could possibly happen), they never pay those costs.
How long does it take to get paid? I send the writer a check within 7 days of the publisher’s check clearing the bank. What if the writer has lots of questions?
Can they call or e-mail the agent and ask? I have a ‘FAQ’ page I send when I request a full manuscript. It answers most questions a client would ask, and I’m happy to e-mail a copy of the Agency/Writer contract ahead of time if they’d like to see it. And, yes, a writer can call me. I’m insane enough to have my phone number listed on my Web site—may all other agents forgive me.
How long does the agent “sit” on manuscripts before sending them out?
For me, not long, but I’ve heard horror stories of clients waiting 12-18 months with nothing to show for it. Is the agent accessible? I have business hours, and appreciate it when writers stick to them, but I love to be in communication with my authors. I respond within 24 hours to calls and e-mails.
What’s the best writing advice you’ve heard?
Write. Edit. Write some more. Writing is re-writing what you’ve just re-written. A writer has to be able to edit without it feeling like they’ve cut off an arm. They’re just words on a piece of paper. A lot of us have children, and none of them are books. Don't send a manuscript out before it’s ready. Have someone you trust look at it (no, I’m too busy). Take rejections for what they are—a bunch of idiots who have no idea you’re the biggest talent to come along since “Gone with the Wind” was written. Then smile, and find the person who’s high on your work without being on drugs.
What’s the worst piece of writing advice you’ve ever received?
Some people are going to send me hate mail for this, but it’ll give me something to read while I’m in the bathroom. I don’t like critique groups. You often get too many people who say the exact opposite of what the others do, and some aren’t qualified to edit your grocery list. On one book, I went back and forth, trying to please everyone and by the time I finished, I never wanted to write again. Some group members say they want you to succeed. They really mean they want you to succeed as long as you succeed after they do. There are exceptions, of course (you know who you are). I’d rather have a partner (ah, that’s a critique partner). I have two worth their weight in gold: Julie Lessman, and Sherri Andervich. Tough if you don't like your names in print, ’cause this is my interview. Oh, the power.
Who do you like to read?
You mean in my spare time after I’ve read all the manuscripts my clients give me to line edit? I read my Bible. Then it’s on to submissions. I need to read the Bible first, so I remember I’m to find SOMETHING, SOMEWHERE, I can praise the writer for. After that, suspense and historicals are my favorite.
Do you have time to read for pleasure with so many submissions to look at?
Yes, I read three minutes each day in between editing for clients and taking a bite of an apple dipped in peanut butter (my standard lunch). Really, not a whole lotta time. I do read my friends’ books. I love Rebecca Forster, Karen Kay, Charlene Sands, and Liz Curtis Higgs. It’s important to keep up with the market, though. I have to get a feel for what each editor likes, so I know what to offer them. I’m always reading something.
Do you have a pet peeve having to do with this biz?
Do you really want me to answer that? Where do I start? Publishing houses, IMHO, don't pay the author what they’re worth. If the industry didn’t have writers, they wouldn’t have an industry. For that matter, they don’t pay editors what they’re worth, either.
Let’s see, what else. Oh, writers who know I’m not taking submissions, but send them anyway because they know I didn’t mean their submission. And one more. There are loads of Web sites that tell everyone how rotten certain agents are, and some of the stuff is true, but not all. Some is sour grapes. I wanna know where there’s a site or loop where agents can warn other agents about who I’ve dubbed, “Authorzillas.” Those writers who send pages of e-mails everyday or call excessively, have to have their finger in every minute detail of the business, therefore making it difficult for us to do our jobs, or writers who don't make deadlines and blame everyone but themselves.
We have to let them go, then they tell everyone we’re bad agents. Sheesh! Somebody stop me! I think the phrase should be, “No client is better than a bad client.” Fortunately, I’m blessed by every one of my clients. I stand behind them 100%, unless someone shoots a bullet at ’em, and then I jump in front.
Can you give us a look into a typical day for you?
I get up around 4 A.M. and read my bible, then answer e-mails. After that I look at outside submissions and queries, if I have any, and I usually do. When I request a partial, I give a short line edit (one to five pages), even if I reject. It takes more time than straight reading.
Why do I do this? Because I’m truly in the business to help people. If a writer gets some guidance, they won’t keep sending the same flawed stuff out. I also give them the six-page Grammar Guide I formulated showing the errors I see most often in submissions and how to fix them. Let’s face it, there’s a lot of competition out there. Sending in a clean submission helps.
Then I get my daughter and husband off to school and work, straighten the house, start the laundry, and roam around my 20 acres for exercise with my dogs, while saying my prayers (haveta multi-task). After that, I eat breakfast, and depending on the day, make calls, study the market, update spreadsheets, edit my client’s work, answer more e-mails, agree to be the final judge in a contest, agree to help a non-client edit their manuscript in my “spare” time, watch “Law and Order” while eating my lunch, then everything starts all over. I work until 7 p.m. most nights, unless there’s a TV show on at 6 p.m. I HAVE to watch. “Dog, the Bounty Hunter” is on Tuesday nights. There are SOME things more important than the publishing industry.
What author do you especially admire and why?
I’m not gonna single anyone out. Too many have admirable qualities. Generally, the author who writes for years and years and never gives up until they’re published because they know it’s their gift, and the writer who writes for years and years and gives up because they realize writing isn’t their gift, and when they stop, they’ll figure out what their true gift is.
What is your favorite and least favorite part of being an agent?
My favorite part, after calling someone to offer representation, is getting an unpublished writer published, especially if I figured out why their manuscript was getting rejected, and helped them fix it. Also, I have tons of thank you notes from authors I had to reject, but have taken the time to help, and I save every one, both e-mail and paper notes. Love getting those.
Least favorite: not being able to help more writers. I can do the work of three people, but only three. There are some people I have to say no to, and it especially hurts when I know and like the person.
What's that special something you look for in a manuscript?
Hard to pinpoint. Would I rather take the writer’s manuscript into the tub with me instead of the paperback I’m currently reading? Is it different in some way? Is it snappy? Does it have great dialogue without superfluous words and storylines? This question is kinda like, “How do you know when you’re in love?” You just … know.
What are some things that set off red flags?
The writer has no basic writing skills whatsoever. There are manuscripts where I can spot flaws and take the time to work with the writer to fix them. Some are beyond hope, at least with the amount of time I have. Also, adding scenes for the sake of making a specific word count. Some writers stick scenes in here or there and it’s obvious what they’re doing. Another thing, I dislike lots of description and backstory all at once right up front.
Writers take note: I give a writer five pages to grab me. After that, I have to move on. I’ve heard of some editors/agents who dump the submission if they don’t think the first line is a strong enough hook.
What makes a manuscript stand out from the rest?
The $100.00 bill taped to the title page. Okay, I like good dialogue and lots of action. I’m in the “plot-driven more than character-driven” crowd, but obviously, great characters are important. I want the characters to grow and change, but it’s not the most important thing to me.
I compare manuscripts to the mega-hit songs we get every once in a while. To me, it’s all about the music. If the notes have a haunting quality or the music really rocks (Evanescence is my favorite band), the words aren’t as important. If you have the most beautiful lyrics ever written, but the music is below average, who wants to listen to it? I want an opening that draws me in right away. I wanna know what the book’s about, and I like fast-paced stories.
We all hear how subjective this business is. Can you elaborate on that?
Just because your writing isn’t my thing, doesn't mean it isn’t someone else’s. When that’s the case, I say so. I’ll use the, “It’s not you, it’s me” line. And I mean it. I started reading a great paranormal the other day, but it was too dark for me. So, I pointed out to the author which editors like her kind of book. There are books no one will like. But for most, if well written, the writer will find someone who the story will connect with.
What's the best piece of advice you can give our readers about getting published?
Get a great critique partner with experience who you can trust to tell you the truth without purposefully being hurtful. If you disagree on a major point, have someone in reserve for a second opinion (no, I already told you, I’m too busy). Keep writing and learning. Even Barbara Streisand still takes voice lessons. Now, if someone could get her to use her mouth to sing … sorry, my bad.
Build relationships with people. Try to be nice to everyone, as your reputation is important in this small industry. Word of mouth could crush you no matter how well you write. No agent or editor wants to sign an “Authorzilla.” Work hard, but take time to dream (I have a two minute block scheduled as soon as I finish this interview).
Let's say I have an intriguing query, a well-developed synopsis and my three sample chapters are strong. Why might I still get a rejection?
You write in a genre I don't represent, and since everything I represent is on my Web site, I shouldn't have received a submission from you. Or, I already represent too many clients in that genre and you’ll be more competition for them. If I can think of an agent who’s looking for that genre, I’ll give a referral. Believe it or not, most of us agents aren’t into this big competitive thing. There are more than enough clients to go around. We help each other when possible. Most of us, anyway. There are exceptions, who will remain nameless.
Do you have any parting words of advice?
Set goals and stick to them. Even if you can only write one page a day, write it. Do something writing related. Edit, follow the market, read an article on promotion, etc. Keep your head in the game. Don't take rejections too hard, everyone gets them. Have a sense of humor. Keep submitting. And remember, nice guys can finish first.
Celtic Hearts Literary Agent Interview ~ Kelly Mortimer
by Vonda Sinclair
Hi Kelly. What drew you to becoming an agent?
Well, I was sittin’ around one day doing nothing and thought, hey, why not be a literary agent? No, I’m not serious. First, I “washed my hands” of my soap business to become a writer. Being a writer trying to get an agent is what drew me. Sheesh! Do you know how hard it is to get an agent? I spent nine months torn between writing and agenting before I knew being an agent was what I wanted, and needed, to do.
What is your background or how did you learn to be an agent?
I started out ahead of the game as one of my degrees is in contract law (the other in finance). I knew the plight of writers (trust me, I feel your pain), and have a third eye right in the middle of my forehead (no, it’s not a pimple) that helps me catch editing errors others may have missed. Being Italian, I love to talk (it’s hard to shut me up unless you stick an organic, gluten-free cookie in my mouth), and had dealt with editors by being the coordinator for the Orange Rose Contest for two years (yes, I’m a masochist). I also have a background in sales and figured if I could convince people to join Amway, I could surely get editors to buy books (disclaimer: don’t mean to offend any Amway people. Great company; great products. But ya gotta admit, it’s a hard sell!). So, I asked an agency to apprentice me, but that didn’t turn out well. My maniacal type “A” personality didn’t mesh with the agency’s, “it’ll get done when we get around to it” mentality. So, after six excruciating months, I opened my own agency.
Do you currently represent books with a Celtic theme or setting and would you be interested in representing more?
When I was actively seeking clients, not one person who wrote Celtic, or even Medieval (I’m an expert in 14th century history) submitted to me. I have one client I signed as a Contemporary Time Travel/Paranormal writer (Sheila Raye) who also writes historicals. I’m reading one of hers right now, but that’s it. I’m not currently open to most submissions, as I got barraged and I keep my client list low so each client feels like they’re my only client. There are exceptions, which are listed on the agency Web site at: www.mortimerliterary.com. Started something fun in January. Every month I’ll post a set of initials on the “Agency News” page of the Web site. If your initials match, you can query.
Are you interested in historical romance, paranormal romance?
I love all things old and historic. That’s why I married my husband. Actually, he’s the love of my life and a great guy. Yes. I love Historicals, except prairie/western romances. Sorry. I love horses and the West (I live in So. California), but If I wanna immerse myself, I’ll watch reruns of “Little House on the Prairie” or “Gunsmoke.” Both excellent shows.... As to Paranormals, I’m kinda over the whole Vampire craze; it was sucking the life outta me (sorry, my bad!). Still love ghost stories, demons, psychics, etc.
How many submissions do you receive a week?
I usually get a few even though I’m not accepting on the whole. There’s always someone who doesn't go to the Web site first and queries, and other instances, like two days ago an editor called me who said she’d heard nice things about me, wanted to work with me, and could I send her something? (See, paying people to spread good rumors about oneself DOES payoff. Gotta spend money to make money!) So, I put a specific need on one of my loops (Inspirational RS) and got many replies I’m currently considering.
Do you read them all yourself or do you have an assistant or reader?
I read the first 3-5 pages of every submission, even if it hurts, and oftentimes it does. I hate saying no, especially to people I know and care about. I joke about making money, but I’m not in this for the money. I lose money with every client. How do I manage that? By line editing every manuscript they give me. I could earn much more money by working for a house freelancing, or by sending my clients to a paid editing service to give me more time to add more clients, but I never will. I’m in this business to help people (really, I’m finally being serious). I’m a Jesus lovin’ woman and I’m here to serve others. Since I worked as a waitress for several years, I’m highly qualified.
Can you tell us what types or subgenres of books you've recently sold?
All inspirationals. Since I was the president of RWA’s inspirational chapter, and a member of the American Christian Fiction Writers, that’s where most of my original submissions came from. I did recently sign some excellent ABA writers, and I’m in the process of kicking down doors for them as we speak (I’m belted in Kung Fu as well as all my other wonderful attributes, like humility).
How much hands-on editing do you do for a client before you submit his/her manuscript?
Already answered that one. When an editor sees my label on a manuscript, I want them to know it’s gonna be a great, clean read. Nothing leaves my desk without a complete line edit aimed at ferreting out character flaws (I’m a character with many flaws, so that’s the easiest one), plot and sub-plotting problems, and grammatical errors and typos.
What is a typical day like for you as an agent?
You really wanna know? I get up around 4:00 a.m., do my stretching exercises, read my Bible, and answer e-mails. Then I perform a Herculean feat pulling my hubby and eight-year-old daughter out of bed (harder than convincing an editor to buy a manuscript), and scoot them off to work and school. I exercise by power-walking around my 20-acre ranch with my dogs, while saying my prayers. My eldest daughter (24) is a homeless methamphetamine addict and my 23-year-old daughter served a tour of duty in Iraq. She’s a civilian now, but as you might guess, she’s fearless. Skipping prayer is NOT an option. Pray for all of my clients every day as well. Then it’s 7:30. Yay! I take a 30 minute break to eat breakfast as I watch an uncut rerun of “I Love Lucy.” After that, depending on the day, I study the market and update my editor database (now around 250 strong), edit clients’ work, do misc. agenting jobs from being a contest judge, offering help to friends and strangers, preparing each client a monthly report, to answering wonderful interview questions (thanks for asking me). Race for the phone (my favorite apparatus) to call editors. Gotta tell them how I can solve all their problems by sending them the best manuscripts money can buy, do more editing, answer more e-mails, toss in a load of laundry, and wash some dishes. Time to take a 45-minute break for lunch, then it’s back for another round of answering e-mails, editing, answering e-mails, editing, e-mails, editing, e-mails, editing—and editing wins by a nose! I quit anywhere from 6-8 p.m.
Do you prefer humorous stories or darker stories?
Do I really have to answer that?! (Where’s that interrobang when you need it?!) Humorous, even though for some strange reason I don't represent romantic comedy. I do like dark villains, but not dark heroes. Tortured heroes work for me (I guess I’m also a sadist).
What causes you to instantly reject something?
Depends on how you define the term “instantly.” I don't think I ever do. Everyone gets a chance from me. I’ve been asked why I read 3-5 pages if I can tell in one paragraph the manuscript isn’t for me. Because some writers start their story in the wrong place, and (may all other agents forgive me; I notice I say that a lot!) I give each a 3-5 page line edit. Since I really do strive to be helpful, just saying “this doesn't meet my needs” doesn't cut it. I want to give the writer some idea of what could be fixed to help them so they don't keep throwing the same flawed pages out and raking in the rejections. I include my six-page Grammar Guide as well.
What caused you to say "yes" to the last client you agreed to represent?
My good friend (a sweetheart to the “enth” degree) Roberta Brown of the Roberta Brown Literary Agency, recommended her. Roberta already had 3 clients writing in the genre, so she asked if I might wanna take a look at the manuscript. I did, and it was fabulous, so I signed the writer. Some people think we agents treat each other as the competition. Not so in most cases. There are plenty of great writers to go around. I’ve sent a couple to some of my friends as well. It may not work out, but it still gives the writer another chance.
What advice would you give to an unpublished author about acquiring a literary agent?
Save up your money; some of us take bribes. Seriously, find one or two people you trust to honestly edit your work. I don't use the word critique any more, as it’s French for “criticize,” and I boycott anything French. Hone your manuscript to your best ability. If you have published friends who like your work, have them send the agent an e-mail. That’s how I read and signed
Mortimer Literary's Writer of the Year for 2006, Robin Miller writing as Robin Caroll. She had a best-selling author whom I’d never met ask me to look at her work. Now I have a new friend I cherish, and a client I love even more. Lastly, don’t give up. It took God six days to create the heavens and the Earth; it may take you six years to get an agent. So, write on!
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